08 6 / 2012

"At 10 I was ready to go,
But the list is just being so slow;
For delay there’s no basis:
No custody cases;
The usher’s just bringing me woe."

06 6 / 2012

"When representing a thief
His intentions may shake like a leaf
If he changes his plea
To one of guilty
Just make sure you endorse the brief"

05 6 / 2012

"Bugger,the barrister thought
In 4 days off work I’ve done naught
It’s gone by so quick
Now I’m in the shit
As tomorrow I’ll be back in court"

01 6 / 2012

"The infamous #TwitterJokeTrial
Went on for quite a while
Poor old Paul Chambers
Made jokes to some strangers
And now he’s awaiting retrial"

01 6 / 2012

"Two judges couldn’t agree
So they are set to be three
Hopefully not to resile
In the #TwitterJokeTrial
From principles keeping speech free"

01 6 / 2012

"Psychos and alcoholics
Counsel engaging in frolics
But why is #Silk poor?
Because it ignores law?
Or the fact that the advocacy’s bollocks!"

01 6 / 2012

"Oh really what is the use!”
Said the lad (his face turning puce)
“I can’t work any faster
For my pupilmaster
It’s frankly just pupil abuse"

01 6 / 2012

"Reaching Friday with glee
The prospect of 4 days off free
But Counsel was glum
To realisation he’d come
That no court meant getting no fee"

01 6 / 2012

"Interviews can be a bit hairy,
Barristers can be frankly scary,
But the #pupillage process,
Is rather a mess
In the end it’s quite arbitrary"

01 6 / 2012

"A clerk with sadistic bent
To faraway courts often sent
Barristers out of favour
Are often heard to quaver
Where the fuck’s Stoke on Trent?!"